June 13: Cherry Cookies

I cheated again. My most recent cookies weren't Martha's. They were Ethel's.

For my mom's 60th Birthday Picnic/Elliott Family Reunion on June 14, I decided to bake one of my great-grandma's recipes--one I've collected for the family recipe book I'm working on. I thought it would be a nice touch. They were actually very good! Although I think that the nostalgia was lost on my family.

I'm guilty of being a loser again. I haven't baked since June 13, but I have many good excuses. For one thing, we went camping last weekend. It was our annual trip to Alta Lake with 300+ Puget Sound-area recovering alcoholics. Those are some crazy mo-fos. These people love to be pulled on inflated rubber behind a boat at 60 mph--especially the recovering meth freaks. Anything for a non-chemical rush, I guess.

This year's trip, however, wasn't as satisfying as last year's trip. I'll just share a few lowlights:

The boat broke.
The air mattress broke.
The tent broke.
Even the tent bag broke.

We have three more camping trips scheduled for this summer. Oh joy.

Two of those trips, though, will be with my good friends, Renee and Denise, and their families. They're veteran campers, so I'll appreciate the emotional support. I'm not a huge fan of eating off the dirt.

Denise, especially, is a long-time camper and knows the ropes. Speaking of Denise, she applied last week for a job where I work! She actually worked there too, ages ago--up until the Black Summer of '04. I made a phone call and used my considerable influence (?) to convince the hiring manager of D's greatness. And I didn't exaggerate. Denise is truly fabulous. We've been friends for 18 years, and in those 18 years, she has taught me so much.

Such as the following important lessons:

1. Stealing fruit from the neighbors' yards in Palm Springs is a favor, not a crime. Those old people don't want all those lemons anyway.
2. Pubic hair, dwarf sex and ambiguous genitalia are perfectly acceptable topics of conversation. Even at work.
3. Assuming a funny ethnic accent is high comedy, not a form of racism.
4. As long as you're still in the state of Missouri, you're not really lost.
5. All you need to do is act tough.
6. The etymology of disgusting euphemisms deserves a place in academia.
7. The word "fuckers," when properly emphasized and slightly whispered, is the ultimate declaration of allegiance against foes of the worst kind (particularly the corporate ones).
8. Telling a prospective CEO that you've seen a former CEO naked is not a good idea. Especially in an interview.
9. Now is always a good time for a Girlfriends Trip.
10. If you spontaneously break into song, your real friends will sing along.

To have Denise back on Regence turf again would be sublime. Keep your fingers crossed.

After posting today's blog, I hope to feel like less of a loser. There's so much I need to be doing that I haven't taken care of lately. Like working out and weeding and paying bills. (Utilities are never truly late, are they?)

My goal for this week, then, is taking care of stuff.

I guess, though, that (bills aside) I took care of the really important stuff. Like taking my cat to the vet. And trying to help a friend get a job. And making sure the kids had camping fun even while James and I were mentally calculating the cost of a new propeller and boat engine repairs. And baking GG's cookies for my mom's birthday felt good. If I'm a good friend, pet-owner and mom, it's largely thanks to the excellent role model that my mom has always been (okay, I'm a so-so mom, but that's not her fault).

So, Happy Birthday, Mom! Thank you for teaching us what life's real priorities are.

But, could you come down and weed?